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Rise of the Random Actor

Some musings

Disclaimer: This is my musing.  I haven't seen anyone else say this is what's going on and I'm also not trying to say it's true --  nor am I trying to take credit for someone else's discovery.   These are just random(ish) thoughts.

So my little rant is basically about Random Actors because they don't seem to get much done and they blame other folks for their lack of productivity, sometimes rather dramatically-- but then I also feel bad for these folks and I can see how there may be forces at work beyond their control.  Like, for real.  

Of course, in my worldview, that doesn't mean you don't storm city hall anyway.  Just because it looks like the solution is impossible, that's no reason not to go for it anyway.  Who cares if the problem is unsolvable - solve it anyway! But that's not what Random Actors do.

Why is that?

It's because they don't feel competent.  They want to feel competent, they want to feel special, they want to be all that - to be heard, to be adored.  But it's not happening for them. And the theory is that it's the "with-it Dad" / "Authority figure" that should impart this message to kids.
If  the " with-it Dad" / " Authority figure" is not around, chances are, this isn't happening.  Chances are, this kid has been hung out to dry.  And how can that be their fault?  (Hint: it's not!)  

0963910337
The Art of Profiling: Reading People Right the First Time ~ Dan Korem
0963910353
Rage of the Random Actor: Disarming Catastrophic Acts And Restoring Lives ~ Dan Korem

And if, indeed, becoming a Random Actor has something to do with the presence of a good father figure, then we do have some horrid statistics to show how bad the draw is for these kids:

  • 43% of US children live without their father [US Department of Census]

That means that 43% of the US children are at risk for being part of these statistics:

  • 90% of homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
  • 80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes. [Criminal Justice & Behaviour, Vol 14, pp. 403-26, 1978]
  • 71% of pregnant teenagers lack a father. [U.S. Department of Health and Human Services press release, Friday, March 26, 1999]
  • 63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes. [US D.H.H.S., Bureau of the Census]
  • 85% of children who exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes. [Center for Disease Control]
  • 90% of adolescent repeat arsonists live with only their mother. [Wray Herbert, “Dousing the Kindlers,” Psychology Today, January, 1985, p. 28]
  • 71% of high school dropouts come from fatherless homes. [National Principals Association Report on the State of High Schools]
  • 75% of adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers come from fatherless homes. [Rainbows f for all God’s Children]
  • 70% of juveniles in state operated institutions have no father. [US Department of Justice, Special Report, Sept. 1988]
  • 85% of youths in prisons grew up in a fatherless home. [Fulton County Georgia jail populations, Texas Department of Corrections, 1992]
  • Fatherless boys and girls are: twice as likely to drop out of high school; twice as likely to end up in jail; four times more likely to need help for emotional or behavioral problems. [US D.H.H.S. news release, March 26, 1999]

These stats don't talk about when (ie what age for the child) the father has left the home, but I heard from my son that most of his classmates had parents that were divorced.   Of the students I taught from college, none of them had parents that were still together.  Oh, wait - one couple was still together.  That's like 1 out of 20.

So basically kids are having to wing this on their own.  They are not getting help on the home front.  

Now, perhaps you're saying, "I didn't have a Dad and I'm not a kook!"  And I have to say, "You've beat the odds!  You've won!"  But for some of the others, starting behind the eight ball and being asked to, basically, pull a rabbit out of the hat, will be too much.  

And the big message - it's not just these kids that suffer.  The rest of society suffers, too, trying to mop up. 

Where does that leave us in the day to day interactions with other folks?

In Dan Korem's book, you can learn how to identify who might have gone the route of the Random Actor and he has tips for how to build them up and bring them back from the brink of violent explosion.  They're equally useful for folks who aren't that extreme, too. 

 

 

Lynn

 

Reiki Master since 1997
 Certified Resonance Repatterning Practitioner since 1997

 

7/21/14

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